Every now and again I stumble across the perfect dive to make poor dietary decisions with zero regret.  This was one of those days.

So I’m driving into South Padre Island for the next leg of the week and it’s late in the afternoon and I’m hungry.  Not like, “gosh I could eat a bite hungry” more like, “If you stand still long enough I’m going to bite you” level hungry.  I figure if I’m considering cannibalism, it might be a good time to get some food in my belly.

Right before you cross the bridge to get to South Padre, you go through Port Isabell (which has a kickass lighthouse).  Right before you get to the bridge there’s Pirate’s Landing which, if you know me, caught my eye.  I mean, come on? Pirates!  But I digress.  It was a bit kitschy and felt like something you’d see at an amusement part and remember that I’m teetering on cannibalism.  It may be fine, but I wasn’t going to show it love on this day. However, driving in there was this burger shack that caught my eye a block or so away.  And when I say shack. I actually mean a shack just about smack under that lighthouse.  So I walked back over and there she was in all her dilapidated glory and I think to myself.

I am home.

Turns out Will and Jacks Burger Shack had a bit of spicy attitude to go along with her charm.  Seating was outback on a patio with tables made from wooden cable spools. As a bonus, a cat was wandering around trying to snag a bird.

I ordered #420 on the menu (Don’t judge me).  The Stoner Burger and a Shiner. The Shiner came in a can with a koozie featuring some other restaurant from Louisiana (That’s class).  And I hung out on the patio just taking it all in and joking around with the staff.  The half-pound burger showed up a little later and, sweet lord of heaven, it was good in the way that might make you uncomfortable if you heard me tell you how I really felt about it.

It was good in the way puppies are good.

It was good in the way true love is good.

It was good in the way that Cindy Crawford is good.

It was good in the way that Jason Momoa is good.

It was good in the way that sunrises, newborn babies and Marvel movies are good.

What I’m trying to say is that it was really, really good.

There’s no effin’ way to eat it without ending up with a big pile of toppings covering your fries.  And you know what?  That’s why God made forks.  Jesus loves you and so places like this exist.

If you love burgers and you’re knocking around Port Isabel, make sure you stop off at Will and Jacks.

But seriously. Do it.